Megaphone Man

Here we go again, headed into a new year. And it’s me, The Megaphone Man coming to you from Marlboro Land,

I’m continually going to fight all these charges, although on a leg, I surely can’t stand.

That’s okay, I still know how to scream, yell and shout,

And everyone is certain, I don’t know what I’m talking about.

Even when I lose, I win because my motto is “always play the victim”, That way, when the time comes, I’ll say “see, I told you they’re all against me”,

Forever trying to lock me up, when the world is aware, “I’ll always be free”.

Well, that’s what I’ve been telling myself all of my life,

Even when I had my very first wife.

She knew from the start, even if she was my number one baby,

I had to step out constantly, because I love the ladies.

Until this very day, I’ll always do “exactly as I please”,

Whomever doesn’t like it, they can always leave.

That’s goes for anyone who decides to vote for me (more than once is much better),

Or didn’t you all get my very latest letter?

Vote for me in person and by mail,

Because a pardon for all will certainly prevail.

It is constantly a mystery,

And especially with my checkered history,

Why anyone would think I’d ever change,

And people call me crazy, no, you’re the ones who are deranged.

So, it’s a damn good idea,

And let me make this perfectly clear,

Should I get into The White House again, I’m going to “burn this country to the ground”,

Forget about last time, “I’ll make certain nothing’s left the second time around”.

I’m always shouting to the top of my voice, about what I’m going to do,

And you fools (those who love me) always let me get closer to you.

Good, that’s exactly the way Satan wants it, you let me do as I please,

Taking the sheep to the slaughterhouse, with effortless ease.

So, welcome to another year, and it’s coming in with a bang,

Everyone pray for me, because it’s a good chance I’m going to hang.

Remember my song, “I’M ALWAYS RIGHT AND NEVER WRONG”, and that’s the record I play,

I listen to it each and every single day.

Those who know me, and believe me, it’s quite a few, all know it’s a number one hit,

They also know, I am full of shit.

So come partake in this wagon train,

There’s a lot of desperados here and we have everything to gain.

We’ll gain the world and in the process lose our souls,

Don’t worry, only suckers really want to be whole.

I never ever want anything to do with any kind of unity,

It’s all about “me, me, me and me”.

I’m not sure why anyone thinks in the end, you’ll get something from me in return,

Nope. You all can go to hell and I hope you burn.

So, listen clearly to my voice,

Because I’m holding an open court.

I will go after everyone on the planet and leave no stone unturned,

I’m coming for you all and “everyone will burn”.

I’m The Megaphone Man, can’t you all hear me, “scream and shout”,

It’ll never be over, until I say so, and “THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT”.

Your Father

God

These are the words from your fearless (only in his mind) wannabe leader interpreted by my son. I’m still waiting and definitely keeping score. In the upcoming year, starting today, we’ll see how many of you want to step out of darkness and into the light. Time will tell.

Time waits for no one,

And very shortly, I’m going to release my son.

Yes, it is getting quite close to that inevitable time,

The clock is ticking away and Mini-Me says, I’m doing just fine.

So, before I go,

I need to let you all know,

They’ll be a new Sheriff in town,

And he’ll be traveling all around.

He will be visiting each and every place,

And coming face-to-face,

With all you men, women, boys and girls,

Yes, over the entire planet and this is not even his world.

Earth is his temporary abode, “his home is heaven”,

He’s just a visitor on your planet. He learned how to count to seven.

My son, Alvin Mann is totally free,

And works strictly for me.

Be a good idea (that’s a subtle hint) to leave him “completely alone”,

Unless of course, and you better be certain, you’re ready to come home.

Prepare yourselves planet earth, because I’m coming, “my name is God”,

My son will follow and he’s my One And Only Lightning Rod.